11 Comments

  1. I was so surprised when I read posts saying these pics were shaming formula feeding. I just don’t see how shaming could be read into them at all. Some people are just looking for something to pick at. It’s such a shame that they’ve taken something so positive and powerful and read a negative into it!

    • I was surprised to – I don’t know how anyone could take offense! I totally get that it is always going to be an emotive subject, but I don’t know why it has to turn into a who’s way is best debate all the time. Thank you for taking the time to read and comment 🙂

      • Betsy

        This was beautifully said I formula feed it wasn’t working out I’m a new mom I pumped as much as I could. I already felt like crap switching. Many moms just felt separated like there efforts weren’t enough. There is a Facebook group called Sanctimommies it’s terrible they were posting that they did not want to see bottles and the tree of life photos and other post saying that mom so choose to formula feed our lazy because they don’t want there boobs to sag. Never using really foul language and insulting moms like this I don’t bash on women who breast-feed I am an advocate on public breast-feeding I want the world to see it as normal and I’m supporting these moms but sometimes I feel like there’s a side where we’re not supported because apparently were not giving the best to our child. I did my own tree of life and I’m happy about it. Motherhood is tough enough I don’t understand why we can’t lift each other up these groups exist to bash other people to spread the hate maybe that’s why some of us felt that way but I don’t disregard the beauty and the purpose of these photos.

  2. The photos don’t upset me at all, quite the opposite, I think they’re really beautiful. And I’ve seen some bottle feeding ones too and would kind of like to try making my own just because they are so pretty. I think the problem is that it’s so emotive, as you’ve rightly said. I have a friend that even a year after having her baby broke down in tears one day when we were discussing breastfeeding because she really wanted to do it, but couldn’t. I find myself clamming up and feeling quite anxious when I think about my own breastfeeding experience. And that’s the trouble isn’t it? With something so emotive people will ALWAYS feel like something that promotes something that they couldn’t / didn’t do is a snidey comment against them when that’s not how it was intended in the first place. Personally, I think it would’ve been absolutely lovely if photos of both breastfeeding and bottle feeding were viral in this format from the off, but that’s not how a trend starts; something has to start it and I’m this instance it was breastfeeding. I think what’s needed is an equal platform for both breastfeeding and formula feeding so that us formula feeding mums aren’t left feeling guilty or ashamed, and breastfeeding mums can celebrate with pride, but that isn’t going to happen as breastfeeding is biologically best and therefore needs promotion. Such a tricky subject!! xxx
    Mrs Lighty recently posted…#DreamTeam Linky 34My Profile

    • This is a really interesting comment. You’re right, it is emotive and nothing is going to take that emotion away. I have seen a lot of breastfeeding mums get ‘offended’ at the bottle feeding photos because it’s ‘missing the point’. I understand that the reason behind it all is the milk ducts are the roots from mum but at the end of the day, isn’t it just about giving your child life and whichever milk you give them, gives then life! As otherwise you are excluding mums who pump exclusively as well – technically the milk came from their milk ducts! I would just love a trend like this to start and to not see any negative comments. Just people saying ‘wow awesome photo’ or ‘well done mama.’ We need more love and support amongst our fellow parents who are going through the same thing. Not everything has to be a battle or a competition! You should definitely do a bottle feeding photo, it will be great! Thank you for your lovely comment xx

      • Only me, popping back from #DreamTeam. Sorry not to bring you any more traffic!! Based on your reply, I think we need more support from mamas of all forms – whether they are going through the same as us or not. When did we all become so judgey anyway?! And I think what is missed a lot of the time, certainly from my perspective, is that had I not switched to formula, not only would I have been a nervous wreck but Baby Lighty would’ve probably ended up undernourished…the 4 week giraffe photo when I’d literally just finished breastfeeding he looks really awful and personally I think he looks like he’s in need of feeding up! I’m sure now that my anxiety affected my milk supply, and so he is actually better off on formula not only because it meant that his mummy was better able to look after him but also because he was finally getting the nourishment that he needed. And I think that’s what’s hard to get across to a lot of breastfeeders, that actually sometimes breast isn’t best. Sorry I’m going to stop there as this comment isn’t actually aimed at you as I’m sure you already know and I’m getting a bit ranty again, haha!! xxx

        • I completely agree with you, and it’s stories like yours that help me to show empathy to others and their reasons for doing what they do. I think it’s difficult for anyone who has had to make the decision to use formula to truly understand why some mums need to. That is why I think this debate is getting old – I’m all for education and knowing the facts, but sometimes you’ve got to do what’s right for you and baby! But I’m going to share my breastfeeding photos because I love them, not because I’m showing off or trying to make anyone feel guilty (that comment is not aimed at you at all, just based on some things I have read in the past few days). What I do know is it’s at debate that is never going to go away xx

  3. Adele

    Great article. I struggled in the beginning with breastfeeding my first child. My supply nearly dried up and I was determined to bring it back so I pumped and pumped day and night for 2 months. I brought my supply back and breastfed my daughter until she was 2.5 years old. I’m proud of this! And I get annoyed with the fact that any time any one shares any kind of pride or happiness towards their breastfeeding experience it has to be slammed by formula feeders. It’s like they’re constantly in defense mode because they feel guilty or something.

  4. I can’t believe this conversation is still going on. It’s 2017. It’s the 21st Century. Why on earth can’t mums just get on with it in the best way they can? Why does there always have to be someone complaining? (Not you btw!!)
    I chose not to breastfeed. I didn’t want to. End of. It was my choice and blimmin heck were people judgemental! I put up with the most upsetting of comments and I never should have.
    I would never dream of saying some of the things I had to put up with to another Mum. No one has the right to. Why can’t we all just praise each other for trying our best – at a time that is an emotional rollercoaster at the best of times?!
    I’m glad you wrote this post – even though you shouldn’t have to! If it makes one person think before they open their mouth then it’s done it’s job.
    And well done you on nailing the breastfeeding for so long, that’s really wonderful. #marvmondays
    Jaki recently posted…I Love My Life – Wednesday Wisdom 11My Profile

    • I completely agree – why is a conversation, discussion, debate even needed? I’m all for giving people the facts, giving them the support when needed but at the end of the day just accept a mother’s decision whatever it is! It really doesn’t affect anyone else. Thank you for reading x

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